Eternal Sunshine of the Spotted Heart

To Kiddo, for…

…the many days and sleepness nights of breastfeeding when literally, I was all that you needed. There are no words to describe the awesome feeling of being so needed by another person

…the time when you saw me crying, you kissed me and said, “Don’t cry, Mommy. I’m sowee.” You were just a little over a year old then, but you knew exactly what to say to comfort me

…every night that you ask me to put you to sleep. You’ll have to move to your own bed soon, but for now, I’ll savor the feeling of your arm and leg wrapped around me as you sleep soundly

…the noises you blow into my belly in an effort to tickle me and make me laugh. I will always remember the sound of your laughter as a baby even when you are no longer one

…the first time that you said, “I love you, Mommy” for no reason at all. I now know what it is like to be loved unconditionally, and without question

…your cries of, “Ayaw iwan!” when I have to leave the house. Pretty soon I’ll be the one asking you to stay home and spend some time with me

…the mornings that you barge into the shower and say, “Mommy, I want to take a baf with you”. You’re starting to want to do things by yourself, but it’s good to know that you still want to have a certain bonding time that we can call our own

…the stories that you ask me to read to you while you snuggle up to me or sit across my back. You know some of the stories so well already that you end up reading bits of it to me

…the look of uncertainty on your face when you say, “Mommy, I can’t. You have to hold me.” before each higher step you take on the playground slide. I will always be at the sidelines, ready to hold your hand and keep you from falling even when you think you’re sure you can handle things on your own

…the Sunday mornings when you wake me up by literally peeling back my eyelids and saying, “Time to wake up, Mommy!”. I’m not always able to get up right away, but you always patiently wait until I do

…each time you ask me to rub noses with you. I will always long for your affection, and your cute and funny ways of showing it

...each new secret identity that you assume -- from Spiderman to Batman, to Winnie the Pooh. I am so sure that you will grow up to be whoever you want and dream to be

...every new pet name that you give me -- from Mommy Crocodile, to Mommy Kanga to Mommy Mouse. I may go by many names, but only you can call me Mommy

You’re growing up so fast. Too fast. Before I know it, you’ll prefer to be with your friends rather than me. You’ll start asserting your independence and answering back. (you may not even want to be seen with me!) You may even possibly hate me when I don’t like a particular boy that you will bring home. The time will come when you won’t need me in your life as much.

But I will always have these memories that I can look back on to remind me of a simpler time when all you wanted was me, and I was enough to make it all better.

Thank you, Kiddo, for these memories. They, as are you, are like an eternal ray of sunshine that thawed out the hardened spot that was my heart, lighting it with enough love and warmth to last me until my old age.